?

Log in

you can't spend your whole life jerking off (◞‸◟;)
31 May 2016 @ 03:32 am
2016  
scrapbookCollapse )
 
 
you can't spend your whole life jerking off (◞‸◟;)
03 March 2014 @ 04:20 am
2014  
scrapbookCollapse )
 
 
Current Music: Vodka Rain - 보고싶어 | Powered by Last.fm
 
 
you can't spend your whole life jerking off (◞‸◟;)
26 February 2013 @ 12:41 am
i remember waking up gasping for air and driving to school hunched over my steering wheel wheezing while my heart went heavy with pain and my head went light with euphoria ah those were the days, those were the days
 
 
you can't spend your whole life jerking off (◞‸◟;)
26 January 2013 @ 02:53 am
i know i said a long, long time ago that i wasn't bitter anymore and ready to start over but it's only now that i can say it and mean it. i can care about other people now, even if i don't have the energy to be consistent, i can care about stuff that isn't me. i feel ready to move on for real this time. i'm ready to start over! if i get sad again i will know what is going on and what to do to help myself, so i'm not scared. i still have no idea why i am here on this earth and i don't have anything to live for but it's okay, i'm empty so i can be filled up. right? c: anyways, i'm gonna start by searching for a little part time job i guess... u g h bc this place gives me anxiety since apparently everyone knows me and talks about me behind my back??? but i gotta start somewhere so.

there's still the little problem of my fucked up sleeping (i am no longer an insomniac but in exchange i now sleep from 4am to 5pm and am awake during the night and lol, i'm so beyond giving up) but whatever
 
 
you can't spend your whole life jerking off (◞‸◟;)
15 January 2013 @ 07:00 am
the apocalypse happens slowly. it starts from inside your head and ripples outward over the rest of the world, and it will dawn on you in the middle of the dry grey landscape, in tandem with the last sunrise you will ever see, that none of it was ever real in the first place.
 
 
Current Music: pg.lost - Yes I Am | Powered by Last.fm
 
 
 
you can't spend your whole life jerking off (◞‸◟;)
02 January 2013 @ 07:13 pm
2013  
scrapbookCollapse )
 
 
you can't spend your whole life jerking off (◞‸◟;)
11 December 2012 @ 01:58 am
i got my first tattoo today
!!

there's something relaxing about being hurt with such care and detail. about someone putting all their focus on you, but not really you. about someone making sure that you're perfect, even though that's what you're paying them to do, about someone treating your skin like it's worth only the best. there's something relaxing about someone causing you pain and knowing that they are, but doing it without the intent to hurt you. it's the shallowest level of trust, but it's still there, casual and calming. they're biting into your skin and marking you, but you control where and how they do it; it's a strange power dynamic. sitting there, helpless and in control all at once.

maybe i'm just starved for human interaction
 
 
you can't spend your whole life jerking off (◞‸◟;)
02 December 2012 @ 11:03 pm
"I also realized something that became much clearer later on- that my love affair with ballet was a double-edged sword, a dance/fight to channel pain, to stave off exhaustion, to defy gravity, and to make something extraordinarily difficult appear effortless."

- Victoria Rowell, The Women Who Raised Me